Overheard on Lorimer St.

Time Out New York has an appealing cover story called “The Hipster Must Die!” 

 

As someone who spends time in Williamsburg—ground zero of cultural-zombie trendsetters—I found Time Out’s sentiment to be appealing.  Williamsburg has many things going for it, but a surfeit of vapid hipsters certrainly isn’t one of them. 

When I emerged from Gimme! the other day with my mid-morning cup of aromatic, full-bodied coffee, I was greeted by a wasted young woman and two strung-out, runny-nosed dudes.  The more vapid looking of the two was standing on a skateboard and wearing a faded Dunkin Donuts T-shirt from the days before the donut chain merged with Baskin-Robbins.  (Full confession: Ever since I saw the 1965 Oscar-nominated short “Skater Dater,” I’ve had fanstasies of being a champion skateboarder—and giving it all up for the right girl). 

The dude in front of Gimme! interrupted some minor trick he was doing on his skateboard, spun around, and bellowed in my direction: “Fuck this place!  The coffee costs $1.30.” 

An outrageous price indeed for the very best coffee in the entire borough!  He stood there as if he expected me to hand him my coffee.  Instead I sent him and his two cronies down the street to an old world bakery known for its pastries—though most sell for more than $1.30—and a nondescript cup of coffee that costs 75 cents.